My Thanksgiving dinner was nothing extreme. I ate with my parents and grandparents and was stuck inside all day, drinking wine provided by my dad as my mother and grandparents gawked in silent astonishment, however, I finished the night off strong at a late showing of the cinematic masterpiece, Ninja Assassin. But many of my friends were not so lucky. Has the American family really deteriorated to such a level of guilt, judgement, and insecurity that two of my close friends walked out on their Thanksgiving to retreat back to dorm rooms or city parks, while a few others dashed as soon as the last pie was gone to escape?
I think this says something about the original Thanksgiving. Pilgrims and Indians (Native Americans) were not family or friends, hence, they were the best people to sit around a table with. Only surface judgements could be made, but the uneasy truce of sharing the table made even these unlikely. But the civility inherent in those who do not know each other very well is something that needs to be reintroduced at the family table for the sake of those present.
Posts
Joe, you said it right. Thanksgiving has seemed to become something different now, something more extreme. It is as though the very idea of giving thanks has just disappeared into a void and has been replaced by family feuds and mutter comments. Thank you for telling it as it is!
ReplyDeleteI find it interesting how different people's Thanksgiving experiences seem to be. Personally, my Thanksgiving seemed to be right on track with it's old fashioned meaning: We had a toast, being thankful for good kids and good parents, we ate food, talked about all the things we were grateful for, caught up, and enjoyed each other's company. And then we went to a friend's house for dessert, where we chased little kids around, played with her dogs, and met new people.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's not Thanksgiving as a whole that has lost it's identity, but more the traditions and values of individuals have evolved over time?
**its, not it's. Oops.
ReplyDeleteThanksgiving has definitely become the most dramatic holiday of the year. Though I personally cannot vouch for the large scale arguments and debates that always seem to occur at dinner, I have heard enough from friends. My family is small: my sister, mom, and dad. Arguments do not emerge at our dinner, perhaps because of our size. For us, Thanksgiving dinner is one of the best times of the year. It is one of the few times in the year that we are able to enjoy each other's company for hours on end.
ReplyDeleteThe dynamic of our dinner has changed a large amount as well, since my sister is now 22 and I am 19. Our family, like Allison's, catches up with one another and though time has passed we find our bonds stronger than ever. I suppose we are lucky to beat the drama that seems permeate many family's dinner, and for that I am grateful.
I would tend to agree. My Thanksgivings are never as bad as a lot of my friends, my family is more detached than vicious. However, as families have drifted apart as we have gotten older, I have noticed one significant change especially in Thanksgiving dinner. This is it: parents, grandparents, and other relatives who haven't seen some of the people around the table since the previous Thanksgiving cannot put aside their qualms for the one night, because it is the only night. They have one chance for the year to rag on the rest of their family or to be thankful and put the issues to rest deep within them. I think you know which choice I believe many family members have chosen.
ReplyDelete